13 Women on Why They Actually Love Giving Blowjobs

If you enjoy going down on the woman in your life, there’s a good chance she wants to return the favour by giving you a blowjob.

But have you ever wondered if she’s actually enjoying herself when she gives you a blowjob?

After all, the oral sex move has “job” in its title—it’s only natural to second guess her excitement as she makes her way below your belt.

Of course, every person enjoys different things in the bedroom, and it’s impossible to make a blanket statement about whether or not women like giving blowjobs. But we can tell you this much: some women definitely enjoy performing oral sex on their partners.

Just read the hundreds of responses to this Reddit thread, which asked: “Women who like giving blowjobs, why?”

The women who responded had a variety of reasons for their love of giving head.

On a psychological level, some said they enjoyed the power of having their partner at their mercy, and being able to control their pleasure with the slightest tongue flick.

On a physical level, others said they liked the taste and the feeling of a smooth penis in their mouth.

And then there’s the emotional side to blowjobs: a number of respondents said they use oral sex to show their partner how much they love and appreciate them.

Just remember, not every woman likes to give oral sex. If that’s your partner, be respectful, and don’t worry—you can always get yourself a blowjob machine.

Here’s what 10 women had to say about why they like giving blowjobs.

 

  1. “Because I like receiving, and it would be shitty of me to expect enthusiasm down there if I wasn’t willing to go to town on a guy’s junk myself.” [via]

 

  1. “Turns me on, makes me feel sexy. I love feeling a guy grow hard for me. I suppose its also a control thing.” [via]

 

  1. “I feel in control… but most importantly, I just love pleasing him. My boyfriend is currently working 65-70 hour weeks, manual labor. He’s exhausted when he comes home. He eats dinner, plays on the computer 30-45 minutes, then drags himself to bed. He’s doing all this so I don’t have to worry about working while I’m in school.

“So, a few times a week, he gets a BJ. He’s too tired for sex, but that release helps him sleep, and keep his stress levels in check. I occasionally get sex in the  process but not like we used to. That’s ok. This season of our lives will be over soon, and things will get back to normal.” [via]

 

  1. “Everything! I love pleasing a man. I love hearing him moan. I love being in control of his pleasure. I love insisting that he relax and let me do this! I love the feeling of him inside of me. I love feeling him grow as he becomes more excited! I love the intimate connection that we form. And I love the taste of cum.” [via]

 

  1. “It’s intimate and deeply satisfying. I like the feeling of having a hard or soft penis in my mouth. It’s fulfilling for me.” [via]

 

  1. “I love sucking it from softness to hardness. It’s so exciting feeling it growing in my mouth.” [via]

 

  1. “I love hearing a man moan and cum because of what I’m doing to him…but the moans are the best part. It sucks when a man isn’t vocal.” [via]

 

  1. “I always enjoyed the feeling of giving pleasure to my partner with oral, but only in the past few years did that grow into more of a serious kink. I only really watch blowjob porn. If I am thinking about sex, it is about blowjobs. If I am having sex, (not always but most of the time,) I am thinking about giving him head. It is pretty much my number one desire in the bedroom now. I love deep-throating the most and all the other frills that go with it. But light teasing sessions are also really great, the slow build up for both of us is very exciting. I have absolutely no idea why I like it so much, I just do, but I have never had any complaints so never really worried.” [via]

 

  1. “Guys tend to be quiet and reserved with most sex acts, except blow jobs. We get responsive as hell reactions from you in this activity more than any other with minimal effort or personal distraction. Makes a girl feel sexy, and as such more likely to want more. Theres also a sense of power.” [via]

 

  1. “We have you at our mercy.” [via]

 

  1. “Cum tastes amazing. There’s something to be said about making a man quake when all you do is roll your tongue around and purr to make your mouth vibrate. I also love the fact that it drives him wild when I do it.” [via]

 

  1. “I’ve always hated blowjobs and refused to do it. The most recent guy I’m with has an amazing dick. Its so beautiful and looking at it makes my mouth water. I love how it feels in my mouth, how he swears when my mouth goes on him. He smiles so happily and it makes me happy for making him happy.” [via]

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6 Secrets to Getting Back Together With an Ex

Is your ex is gone? The breakup feels like a mistake. Can you get back together? It’s something a lot of guys have wondered about at some point or another. in this post we outline 6 secrets to getting back together with your ex.

But before you try to reunite, consider this: Do you really want your ex back, or are you just lonely? Or bored? If either applies, please don’t be that dude texting “WYD” when you have no real plans to make an effort.

Also consider whether you want to reconnect because of pride or to get a win. And sometimes that mindset goes into a relationship.”

The thought of “losing” can make you crave an ex and make them seem more attractive than they would otherwise. If you know deep down they’re not really a match, it might be better to let them go.

If there was any kind of abuse, or if you broke up due to issues like an undiagnosed mental health concern or addiction, now is likely not the time to try to get back together. These issues can require individual attention and professional help.

All that said, if you see a real future, and you’re willing to work for a better round two, follow the following advice.

 

  1. Reach out to talk and apologize.

Once you’ve been introspective, talk with your ex if they’re willing to listen. And mean what you say. You can do this regardless of who broke up with who, and even if it was mutual.

Be honest. Reflect the pain that you see your partner has gone through. Take responsibility for your part in that pain. Say ‘I’m sorry’ for very specific things. The more specific, the better.

If you made mistakes and want to get back together, you’ve got to show remorse.

 

  1. Take responsibility for your part in the breakup.

Do you know what you did wrong? Have you grown since then? Answer these questions for yourself. If you’re still in the “My ex is so crazy and it’s all their fault” phase, you’re probably not ready to reconcile.

 

  1. Don’t beat yourself up.

After you’ve reached out, know that any hurt feelings and anxiety you may have can get better.

A lot of people, men and women, go through terrible anxiety. Even people who never struggled with it. But you’ve gotten through breakups before, right? So you can do it again.

 

  1. Go “no contact.”

After you’ve made your case, give your ex space. You want them to understand what it feels like to have you gone. To not get your silly texts. To not cuddle with you. You get the idea.

Some relationship coaches suggest starting with 30 days of no contact or even 2 months. This means no texts, calls, visits, or social media interactions. And absolutely no begging—a total turn-off.

Once you have made it very clear, without an excuse, that you were wrong, that you are so sorry, that you regret it, that it will never happen again, and that you want to be with this person if they take you back, you’ve got to back off and use the no contact rule.

If you were a good boyfriend, stepping back gives your ex a chance to remember. But if they don’t want you back, pleading won’t help.

  1. Don’t rush into dating.

Don’t jump back into the dating pool to try to get over your ex or make them jealous. That means you should resist the urge to go to Petty Town—aka the sad side of social media—to try to antagonize your ex. If your ex finds out you’re seeing someone new and concludes you don’t care about them, this tactic can blow up in your face.

Also, don’t date if you’re still upset. That’s not fair to the next person who may want to connect, and it doesn’t necessarily let you process the break-up.

 

  1. Have hope.

There’s no all-powerful magic trick to getting your ex back, no matter what your friends, search results, or random online spell-casters tell you.

But there is honesty, growth, and hope. So learn from the situation. Become a better man. Appreciate your ex’s role in your life, but don’t force things.

You don’t have to get them back today or tomorrow, Wilson says. And if your ex does return, he suggests taking things slowly to have the best chance of success. No matter what, be willing to move on.

But remember: no “WYD” texts while you wait.

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6 Signs You May Have Had COVID-19 Without Realizing It

Whether you had a “bad cold” this winter or recently endured a cough that would not quit, it’s only natural to wonder if you might have had COVID-19 without realizing it.

That’s especially true now that infectious disease experts say the virus was likely already spreading before cities started to lock down and put social distancing orders in place.

As the weeks progress, it’s become evident that this is a virus that was widespread throughout our country, particularly in more populated areas, sooner than we thought.

So, could you have had COVID-19 without realizing it? It’s possible.

Most people who have coronavirus have an uncomplicated case of infection, and it could be indistinguishable from the cold or influenza.

Plus, some people have no symptoms at all—up to 40% of infections, according to estimates from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

Unfortunately, there’s no way to know with 100% certainty if that illness you dealt with last winter was COVID-19 or if you happened to pick up an asymptomatic case at some time. But experts say some signs can be tip-offs that you might have had COVID-19 already. Here are the top ones to know, plus what it means for immunity.

 

  1. You had a “bad cold.”

It can be tough to distinguish a cold from a mild form of COVID-19 without a test, depending on which symptoms you experience, but colds don’t typically cause shortness of breath, severe headaches, or gastrointestinal symptoms like COVID-19 can. Here’s the full list of the CDC’s official symptoms:

  • Fever or chills
  • Cough
  • Shortness of breath or difficulty breathing
  • Fatigue
  • Muscle or body aches
  • Headache
  • New loss of taste or smell
  • Sore throat
  • Congestion or runny nose
  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Diarrhea

 

  1. You’ve been dealing with unexplained hair loss.

This hasn’t been widely studied in the context of COVID-19, but many people who have recovered from the virus are reporting issues with hair loss.

Actress Alyssa Milano, who has been suffering from COVID-19 symptoms for months, shared a video of herself on Instagram in early August repeatedly brushing out large clumps of hair after she showered.

Members of Survivor Corps, the Facebook support group for people who have had COVID-19, have also talked about experiencing hair loss months after recovering from the virus. It’s due to a condition known as telogen effluvium, and it can be caused by a slew of factors, including pregnancy, extreme stress, weight loss, and illnesses other than COVID-19.

It’s unlikely that you would just lose more hair than usual without having other COVID-19 symptoms, like a cough or fever. It’s also important to note that hair loss can happen from stress in general, he says—and there’s been a lot of stress due to the pandemic. If you’re experiencing hair loss, it’s possible it’s due to an unknown COVID infection, a build-up of stress during uncertain times, or another underlying issue.

 

  1. You lost your sense of smell or taste at one point.

Loss of smell and taste has been a big hallmark of COVID-19. While this symptom doesn’t occur for everyone, doctors points out that it’s now strongly linked with the novel coronavirus.

 

Preliminary data found that, in COVID-19 patients who lost their sense of smell, 27% had “some improvement” within about seven days, while most were better within 10 days.

 

Worth noting: It’s also possible to temporarily lose these senses with other respiratory conditions, like a cold, the flu, a sinus infection, or even with seasonal allergies. But experts say that the symptom can linger in some people and last for months after recovering from COVID-19.

  1. You’re really, really tired.

This is one of the biggest lingering effects after a person has COVID-19, according to the JAMA study. That study found that 53% of patients said they were struggling with fatigue around 60 days after they first showed signs of the virus.

We’re seeing some people who had mild illness who have fatigue for some period of time. But, he says, it’s not entirely clear right now why this happens. It could be the way a person’s immune system reacts to the virus, or it could simply be the way the virus works in the body.

Keep in mind that fatigue is a really common issue and can be a sign of many different health issues (including, of course, not getting enough sleep). Like hair loss, people who experience fatigue due to COVID-19 would have also had other symptoms of the virus in the past.

 

  1. You feel breathless sometimes.

Research published in the journal JAMA has found that people with COVID-19 can have after-effects of the virus, including shortness of breath. It’s not entirely clear why at this point or how long this can last, but it’s likely due to lasting inflammation in the lungs.

This is one of the well-known lingering effects in people who were diagnosed with COVID-19. If you have this, well, perhaps that illness you experienced before was actually COVID.

If you’re experiencing shortness of breath, call your primary care physician for guidance or ask for a referral to a pulmonologist. They can often prescribe medications and treatments, like an inhaler, that can help.

  1. You have a cough that will not go away.

A lingering cough is another symptom that people who participated in the JAMA study reported. The cough is often dry, meaning that nothing comes up, like phlegm or mucus. This is fairly common: Data from the CDC found that 43% of people who had COVID-19 still had a cough 14 to 21 days after getting a positive test for the virus.

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Male Masturbation: 5 Things You Didn’t Know

If there’s one thing that almost every guy is an expert at, it’s masturbation. After years of extensive, hands-on experience, you think you know everything there is to know. But according to the experts, maybe you don’t.

Here are 5 things about male masturbation that may surprise you.

 

  1. Masturbation does not have the health benefits that sex does.

It appears that not all orgasms are created equally.

Study after study shows that intercourse has all sorts of benefits for men — for your blood pressure, heart and prostate health, pain, and more. You’d think that masturbation would, too. But it doesn’t.

Why would it make a difference whether you ejaculate during sex or on your own? No one’s sure. But your body seems to respond differently. Even the makeup of semen is different if you masturbate instead of having sex.

Still, does it really matter? Have you honestly been masturbating all these years only because you wanted to boost your prostate health? Didn’t think so. But one study, Harvard’s Health Professional Follow-up, showed that Masturbation may help lower risk of prostate cancer.

 

  1. There is no “normal” amount of masturbation.

Guys can get hung up on whether they masturbate too much. But it’s not how many times you masturbate in a week (or day) that really matters. It’s how it fits into your life.

If you masturbate many times a day and have a healthy, satisfying life, good for you. But if you masturbate many times a day and you’re missing work or giving up on sex with your partner because of it, consider seeing a sex therapist.

Even then, there’s nothing specific about masturbation that’s the problem. Compulsive masturbation is like any behavior that disrupts your life — whether it’s compulsively playing poker or checking your social media every other minute.

 

  1. Masturbation is not risk-free.

Sure, it’s low-risk. It’s the safest form of sex possible. No one ever caught an STD from themselves or made themselves pregnant. But like other low-risk activities (walking, eating, etc), it still has some risks.

Frequent or rough masturbation can cause minor skin irritation. Forcefully bending an erect penis can rupture the chambers that fill with blood, a rare but gruesome condition called penile fracture.

Afterwards, the penis looks like an eggplant. It will get purple and swollen. Most men need surgery to repair it.

 

  1. Masturbating doesn’t reflect on your relationship.

The most damaging myth about male masturbation is that it’s a sign something is wrong in your relationship.

The fact is that most guys masturbate. They masturbate if they’re single, in a bad relationship, or in a great relationship. It’s just something they do that has nothing to do with their partners.

Masturbation isn’t only about sex. For many, it’s a routine way of relieving stress, clearing your head before work, or going to sleep.

 

  1. Masturbation is almost certainly good for your sex life.

Masturbation can help your sex life, since it’s how guys learn what they like during sex.

Are there exceptions? Some guys do get so hooked on a certain amount of pressure during masturbation or the stimulation of porn that they can’t perform with a partner.

For the vast majority of men, masturbation is a healthy thing.

Be more concerned about a guy who’s stopped masturbating. It can be a sign of anxiety or health problems — than a guy who’s doing it regularly.

 

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5 Relationship’s Love Languages

Relationships, like any other thing in this life, are both vital and complicated. When two people come together to create a future with someone they love, they can find themselves up against a number of elements or adversaries that make it hard for them to stay connected and true. By learning how to define the way they love, and the things which they need to feel loved, they can better protect their relationship and better navigate the chaos that is modern day life.

The “Five Love Languages” is the name of a model for couples communication, and also a related series of books by Gary Chapman. Chapman believes that people respond best to one of 5 “love languages,” and that if you want to be heard by your partner, it’s best to communicate in their “primary” love language, and also their “secondary” love language.   The love languages are:

Gifts

This one may sound like it’s materialistic or reserved for gold diggers. But if this is your #1 language, don’t question your character. It actually has more to do with the thought behind the gift than the gift itself. You appreciate the thoughtfulness behind gift giving (whether it’s a grand birthday present or bringing home your favourite magazine from a trip to the drugstore). All gifts, whether small and daily or big and grand, remind you how much you matter to your partner and how much thoughtfulness and effort they think you’re worth. Missed birthdays or thoughtless gifts are your relationship nightmare because it makes you feel like your partner doesn’t care about you

Quality time

Quality time relates to spending time together. Whether it’s watching a movie together, going for a walk, or having a date night, as a couple you really have to value doing things together. What you do is less important than the fact that you are spending time together focused on each other, so give your partner your undivided attention. Some couples think they are spending time together when, in reality, they are only living in close proximity. Those who value quality time may also feel a strong need for quality conversations. They want eye contact and focused attention when they speak. They aren’t always looking for solutions when they express their feelings, they just want to feel heard.

Words of affirmation

A lot of people feel loved when their partner expresses words of affirmation to them. Affirmations serve as reminders to someone that all is well in the relationship. Those who speak this language feel supported when they hear things like, “You are so beautiful” or “I really appreciate you”. This can be expressed in many different ways, whether that’s via text, a letter, a spoken word, or a card.

In the case of this love language, words speak louder than actions. The focus is on using language that allows your partner to feel that they are appreciated, desired, and cherished.

Acts of service

For anyone with acts of service as their love language, actions speak louder than words. For people this love language resonates with, words and gifts might seem empty. “What proves more important is a partner putting forth the effort to make life a little easier and sweeter. Cooking a meal, running an errand without being asked, remembering to take care of the small details of life in a way that shows their beloved they are seen and loved.” Doing things you anticipate your partner wants or needs demonstrates how much you value and care for them.

Physical touch

First thing’s first: Physical touch doesn’t always equate to being sexual physical touch sounds simple enough when applied to sex, but many people don’t realize that touch is, in fact, a language and that it communicates intention. It is important for a person with this love language to understand their own needs and boundaries around touch, and then communicate them to their partner. For this, it helps to think of touch as a spectrum: On the one side you have platonic touch, and on the opposite side you have sexual touch, with varying types and degrees of touch in between.”

Chapman’s theory is that most people communicate in their primary love language while neglecting their partner’s. So a partner who is into gifts might have trouble showing their love to a partner who is into acts of service, unless they change their approach.

6 Reasons Resentment Creeps Into Your Relationships and how to fix it

Have you ever felt taken advantage of, or dismissed, by your partner, family member, teacher or boss? That’s resentment rearing its ugly head.

At first, you feel angry that you’re not being treated fairly or that your needs are being ignored. Over time, this snowballs into disappointment, bitterness and hard feelings.

It’s very difficult to address misunderstandings when you don’t think the other person understands or appreciates you. You get into a tug of war about who’s right and who’s wrong, and egos get in the way.

In this post, we cover six common problems that spark the fires of resentment.

1. Taking advantage of others

If you think your partner is being selfish, first try stepping into their shoes. Ask yourself why they are so intent on getting their own needs met.

Also, note that some people weren’t taught etiquette as kids. Others endured childhood trauma that made them focus on survival, and their own needs, first.

Gently tell your partner how their behaviour makes you feel using “I” statements.

If that doesn’t work, learn to tell your partner “no” confidently and with conviction

2. Always having to be right

 

When someone insists that they’re right all the time, it comes across as arrogant.

If you want me to empty the dishwasher, fold the laundry or manage the toothpaste in a certain way, you’re imposing your views of the world onto me. There are many paths up the mountain.

Defend your right to do things your own way. Speak up quickly; don’t let the feelings fester. The longer you wait, the more resentment is likely to build and explode in an argument over something insignificant.

3. Unrealistic expectations

Considering other people’s nature and habits with clear eyes can spare you emotional turmoil.

Let’s say you expect your significant other to buy you a romantic gift, and they don’t. If it’s not in their personality to do something like that, you’ve set yourself up for feeling resentful.

Try adjusting your expectations instead. Your partner may be showing appreciation in a different way.

4. Feeling put down

Thoughtless remarks and taunts rankle. Know your trigger buttons. Some people trigger our anger without even knowing it.

Considering the person’s intent can head off resentment before it takes root.

But if other person knows your triggers and intentionally hits them, your resentment may be a message.

Don’t ignore the messenger. If you feel repeatedly discounted by a friend, this may be a sign that they are not a good person to have in your life.

5. Not being heard

Does your significant other seem miles away when you’re chatting in the morning? Don’t take it so personally. Listening is incredibly difficult. Expect that you’ll have to repeat your message.

Send a voice mail or text message later, and recap what you wanted to say.

6. Always being late

You may feel that because someone is never on time, they don’t care about you.

It’s tempting to show up late for them, but that only adds fuel to the fire. Gently point out how their lateness makes you feel, and what you need.

Then set firm limits. Tell the other person how long you’ll wait, and have a backup plan in place in case they’re late.

A change in thinking can also help. Try to view the other person’s lateness as a reflection on them, and not you. Being late may have less to do with respecting your time and more to do with their own habits or anxiety.

Always running into the house for one more thing, or getting distracted by inconsequential things just before you have to leave may be an attempt to ease anxiety.

You can decide not to be emotionally injured or roughed up by any of that.

 

Should you leave the relationship, or not?

What should you do when resentment sours a relationship?

There’s no question that you should sever ties if you’re being abused emotionally or physically.

But the lines are less clear when resentment has been building for lesser concerns.

 

“For example, if you put a high priority on family, or if work pays your bills, then you may have to learn to tolerate others’ displays of humanness,”

Practising empathy can help. “Acceptance and forgiveness reduce resentment”

 

Can people ‘learn’ empathy?

It’s possible to learn to be a more empathetic partner and to let go of problem behaviours. But you have to be willing to change.

A good therapist can show you how to accept the discomfort associated with change — and offer you options you may not have considered and a perspective you may not have seen.

Most people go to therapy for a little while, then practice like crazy afterwards. And it’s in the practising like crazy that people grow.

Practice being skilled at quickly getting to the root of a relationship problem — before anger, misery or bitterness creep in.

Then, once you address an issue, don’t rehash it, consider it a learning moment to use in the future. Don’t look backwards. You aren’t going that way anymore.

6 tips that will modify your sex life into a great one

There’s no arguing that “quickie sex” can be arousing, exciting and satisfying. It’s good for when passions override all thought and desire wins. However, most women will agree that the best sexual encounters occur when a man knows and understands the importance of making your lovemaking experience enjoyable.

Too much boredom in your bedroom? Revitalize your sex life with these 6 tips:

Don’t take it personally.

Differences in sexual desire within couples are very common. Although it is hard to have your advances rejected repeatedly without taking it personally, you need to remind yourself that a partner’s lack of interest in sex just may not be about you, your attractiveness, or your qualities as a human being. It may be a matter of a hormone deficiency or other physiological problems—or feelings the person has about himself or herself. Although you undoubtedly want things to change, try to develop a little empathy. Chances are, given the choice, he or she would prefer to feel turned on easily. It’s no picnic to feel disinterested in something your partner thrives on. He or she may feel inadequate, for example. The situation hurts you, but don’t underestimate how painful it is for your partner. Even if he or she acts defensively, your partner probably spends lots of time wondering why things aren’t easier between you. Try to be understanding

Give yourself time.

As you age, your sexual responses slow down. You and your partner can improve your chances of success by finding a quiet, comfortable, interruption-free setting for sex. Also, understand that the physical changes in your body mean that you’ll need more time to get aroused and reach orgasm. When you think about it, spending more time having sex isn’t a bad thing, working these physical necessities into your lovemaking routine can open up doors to a new kind of sexual experience.

Make a Plan

When life becomes busy and schedules are hectic, plan for sexual encounters with one another. Some people may find scheduling undesirable, but it all depends on how you look at it. You can make plans just as exciting as spontaneous sex. Flirting throughout the day or specifying a “sex date” can build anticipation. Try to set the mood in advance. If you want to have good sex at night, start the foreplay in the morning. Let your partner know you care and are thinking about them throughout the day with notes, e-mails, texts, phone calls, hugs, or other flirtatious gestures.

Watch porn together

Discuss with your partner the type of porn you both like. Consider showing these to each other or search for one together that you can both compromise on. It’s usually used in private, which makes watching porn with your partner feel even more risqué. Porn builds sexual tension and piques curiosity, but don’t limit yourselves to screens. See what happens when you take turns reading erotic literature to each other. Even if you break down in giggles before you turn the page, you’re on the right track. Laughter is a great way to spice things up, too.

Include foreplay

There is no great sexual experience without foreplay. It’s a fact: Women typically need foreplay to have good sex. That’s a really good reason not to cut corners with it. Foreplay is really important for most women because they tend to take a longer time to get into the mood. Usually its women who complain that men want to skip to the main course of intercourse, but often they need more time to open up. Foreplay helps lubrication flow and makes intercourse all the more pleasurable.

Love yourself too

We talk a lot about body image, and it’s for a good reason. Feeling good about yourself improves more areas of your life than just your self-esteem, and it’s bound to improve your sex life significantly. Just think about it. If you could be naked with your partner and feel proud of your body, how much weight and stress that would lift off of your shoulders? It’s amazing, and it’s so underrated.

 Conclusion

Sometimes keeping passion alive in the bedroom has nothing to do with sex at all. Take a tennis lesson, try a new restaurant, and go on a hike together. “When you do a fun activity that’s not sexual with your partner, you’ll pay attention to one-another, which helps build desire, and that’s a form of foreplay,” says Amy Levine, certified sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure.

Your pain matters because you matter

If we live in a traumatic state for an extended period of time we want relief more than anything else. Because of the lack of education around trauma we rarely hear the words, “what you are experiencing is quite normal considering what’s been done to you.” That lack of affirmation leaves us vulnerable thinking something is severely wrong with how we do things. That’s not true. The truth is our body offers a response to what it’s registered. So, those responses are coming from a place of pain and awareness.

Very few of us have been given permission to be honest about our pain. Very few of us have had access to the proper help to expose the trauma. Very few of us had the language to describe what’s going on inside of us. But many are finding solace, that this painful part of the journey is shared.

How many of us have been misdiagnosed while dismissing trauma? How many of us believed we were the problem? How many of us believed that what happened to us was not that bad, and someone else could have handled it better?

These are the after-effects of the trauma doubling down and keeping us exposed to the rawest parts. But then we look out and through our searching, our hunger, our need to be understood. We find that not only are we not alone, but there are thousands who speak that language inside of us.

Those words and phrases that only make sense to someone who knows great pain. Those moments that define how our lives were altered, but we’ve needed a lifeline to preserve what’s left.

Here are a few things to reflect on to help you on your healing journey.

  1. It’s not humanly possible to convince someone to abuse you. People are abused because of an abuser.
  2. It is common and beautiful to be conflicted and take on the blame if you were abused by someone you loved. You still did not create that abuse.
  3. The conflict you may be experiencing internally is a much-needed dialogue of deep breaths and awareness of you looking back at your younger self and saying “You are mine. What they lacked in safety for you, I will restore.

Now, here we are. We are bravely, boldly and unapologetically telling our stories. That may not be the details. You may not even know their names. But there is an awareness and a new era of people who are linking arms and learning about their unprocessed bravery to survive.

The more you validate those untold stories, the more we break down the social oppression that demands we show up polished and presentable. We are learning that polished and presentable can’t hold a torch to authentic and full of grace.

How to Enlarge Your Penis Yourself – A Safe Natural Method

Penis enlargement has been around for years now and the industry is still waxing stronger. Although there are lots of scam products and programs still available that claim to give you increased size but at the end fails.

It is so painful and demoralizing thinking about the time and money you have put into such product or program. This post will show you how to enlarge your penis yourself, the safe and natural way.

Exercises are the best natural way to increase your penis enlargement. Just as your body tissues can be increased through exercises, your penis too can also be increased through exercises.

However, the kind of exercise differs. You can go for outdoor jogging, walking on treadmills, skipping or even dancing just to exercise the body. But for penis exercise, it is not the same. The natural exercise used to enlarge the penis is called jelqing.

Enlarging the penis through this natural method simply means: you should not expect an overnight result and also you should be prepared to practice it consistently. Patience is the watchword here.

 

Practice the below jelqing routine consistently and you will see how your penis will grow.

 

  1. Run warm water on a clean towel and wrap that warm towel on your penis for about a minute or two. This is called a warm up exercise.

 

  1. Bring yourself to semi erection and apply some lubricant on your hand and penis.

 

  1. Grab the base of your shaft between the thumb and first finger of one hand like making an OK symbol and move them upward towards the base of the head of your penis. You must not do it in a rush just take about 1-2 seconds before stopping at the head of your penis.

 

  1. Repeat the whole process all over again starting from the base and maintaining the same pressure.

 

  1. You can repeat this for about 5 minutes. You can increase the time and repetition when you get more used to this practice.

 

  1. The last process is to perform the warm down exercise. Just like the warm up exercise, wrap a warm towel over your penis for about 1 or 2 minutes. You can also use the oil to massage your penis lightly for about 1 or 2 minutes.

For safe Penis Enlargement in Johannesburg contact us today

6 Things You Should Be Doing To the Clitoris

In this post we will take you through things you should be doing to your woman’s clitoris.

When it comes to making a person with a vulva orgasm, most folks need more than plain old penetration.

Yes your penis is great and all, but only a quarter of vulva owners routinely come during vaginal intercourse, meaning that a lot of people need some form of clitoral stimulation in order to climax.

 

Packed with nerve endings, the clitoris is one of the most sensitive erogenous zones. It has around 8,000 nerve endings, which is double the number in a penis.

So what can you do to give your partner a mind-blowing clitoral orgasm?

Well, for starters, make sure you know where to find the clitoris: at the top of the vulva, just under the spot where the inner labia meet. The clitoris also extends up to 5 inches inside the body.

 

And now, to stimulate the clitoris? If not sure ask your partner!

Surprise your partner tonight with one—or all—of these clitoral stimulation tricks, using not just your tongue, but also your lips, fingers, and toys. And don’t forget: there are a number of sex positions where you can reach around and stimulate your partner’s clit with your fingers or a vibrator during penetration. There’s no reason why penetration and clit stimulation have to be separate; the two can (and should!) exist in perfect harmony.

 

  1. Pick a Side

When it comes to clitoral stimulation, 4 out of 10 women have a preferred side,  Ask her if there’s a side she likes better—and if she’s not sure, experiment on both.

 

  1. Use your imagination.

When you’re flicking your tongue over her clitoris, imagine you are painting a fence from top to bottom, then move your tongue side to  side.

  1. Suck and Nibble

Instead of just licking her, use your lips and tongue to suck on her clit.

The entire vulva consists of sensitive nerve fibers. So being able to suck on the glans or the head of the clit and lightly nibble on her inner and outer labia, or suck a little on labia, will stimulate the nerve fibers.

The sucking will also lead to increased vasocongestion, or more blood flow, to the vulva and the clitoris.

 

  1. Don’t Forget the Shaft

While a lot of attention is spent on the tip of the clitoris—the part located at the top of the vulva—it also has two “legs” that extend up to five inches inside the body, known as the “shaft.”

 

Slide your fingers to either side of her clitoral shaft. Pull and push the clitoral hood across the clitoris and move in circles, diagonals, and spontaneous un-choreographed fashions so as to stay unpredictable.

 

  1. Play the Harmonica

Once your partner is in the midst of an orgasm, add some oral vibration to her experience.

 

Make your lips into an O and take her clitoris in your mouth. Then make humming sounds as you suck on her clit, as if you are playing the harmonica, so that she can feel the warm, wet vibrations.

  1. Draw circles

In study 3 out of 4 women said they love it when you trace little circles on or around the clit. You can use your tongue, your finger, or two fingers—or all of the above.

It is noted that some women prefer the clockwise movement – which is when you trace from the bottom of th